I'm not Dorian Gray

Some of you, guys, constantly asked me questions like that: "Why do you look so young?", "Have you sold your soul to the Devil?", "Do you use golden revitalift threads?", "How many children do you kill a day?", "Do you drink blood of unborn children?". That's mockingly fun. I know. But my answer is NO to all of the questions above. Seriously, the core of my juvenility is simply in these Soldiers of Beauty which I've been using every single day since I'm eleven y.o:

They are new recruits which have been helping me to keep my flesh taut for about four or five years. I used to use different kinds of products in different moments of my life. I mainly follow advice of my aesthetician, that's how I choose them. Cause I have no idea of how to choose beauty products 'correctly', if this word is used 'correctly' in the context (pardon my French). I mean the last page I read in fashion magazines is one that tells about beauty products, or I just skip it in most cases. That's bad, cause I am going to stock Chanel night creams, YSL powders, ESTEE LAUDER everything (whom I admire very much) on a shelf in my newly renovated bathroom to match its glamour and shine inside. That's why I should be informed about the best of the best products beforehand!

My ignorance in this point is explainable. Firstly, I'm poor to afford myself Chanel products. Secondly, I haven't been asked to appear on the cover of TATLER advertising the most expensive product in their BEAUTY COSMETIC SURGERY GUIDE. YET! (It might not be TATLER, but any other posh edition where fabulous VAGINISTAS of all sorts are clustered together) Ha-ha. Just give me an impulse, and I'll be Plato of beauty products, Socrates of plastic surgery!

TIM ROTH starring in "BROKEN":

I'm BORED!!!! I have NO inspiration. Maybe it's normal coz hard - working slaves on galleys need rest too. It's been a tiring week. I decided to watch a film today where my favourite actor Tim Roth is starring, The film is called "Broken". I don't want to get you a synopsis, you may read it here. But the film is very SAD. Why ain't I got an intention to watch a comedy the other day? When I'm depressed, I always, f#ing ALWAYS watch dramas. And I hate it, but I can't handle it. So, I've just watched it. And all I want to say is that: 'Where do those directors find such a strong will for torturing their characters so much?" I know life is cruel, but it looks so unnatural when so many broken lives are piled in a 90 - minute movie. I think one drama is enough. And I hate when something is left behind the scenes. Nobody knows what's happened to that histerical father of those three b#ches. Nobody knows whether one of those b#ches died or not after a misbirth. Nobody knows anything about the future of a boy who fell in love with Skunk (yes, the name of a girl there was SKUNK, it's weird, innit?) when he moved for Birmingham. So many questions I have, and nobody can give me the answer.

I was so stressed so that I started cooking. I cooked boiled potatoes with a herring. Here goes lard, and cucumbers for a starter. No vodka though! I'm waiting for my BFF to come. We are going to celebrate his promotion or something. So I'm off. Happy weekends, fashion monkeys! I love y'all.

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Faithfully yours, 

Maurice Chabale


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